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Sunday, July 17, 2011

Just when you thought your situation was the worst...

Emily's situation is far worse than mine. She apologized for harsh language in her post. I say she's entitled.

Harsh language doesn't scare me. I'm the queen of harsh language. I know you aren't begging but I'd sure send you money if I could. My house is still a shambles. I have no working refrigerator or stove and am doing the doo in a camping toilet because the toilet doesn't work either. I'm eating nutrition bars and trail mix. My ex husband hasn't worked in 8 years and he needs to get on the ball and get a fucking job because our son is in college, first to become a pharmacy tech and then to go pre-med. These are important things.

Little rant there--which means your post was effective. I really hope things turn around for you somehow. These times are shit.

Saturday, July 16, 2011

The Truth about Faycin

I feel like a freak and a failure most of the time. Only thing that keeps me going is my animals and supporting my son on his journey to eventually becoming a doctor. I don't know how I deserved such a good son--I was always a disappointment to my family.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Daylight Savings Time is Shit


I know this post is a bit overdue but I found a post on an older blog that triggered these thoughts regarding daylight savings time, how stupid it is, and the way it fucks with our bodies.

DST is shit. I have bipolar disorder and this messing with my schedule usually puts me in a bad place. I usually become more anxious and irritable. I've worked with the elderly for years and it really messes with the poor, fragile individuals who are institutionalized, having their sleep-wake schedule disrupted. This insanity is long overdue to be abolished.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

You Can't "Pray Away the Gay"


Michael In Norfolk is an attorney in his forties. His blog is "Coming Out in Midlife." He discusses in this post how the denial of homosexual orientation as valid causes harm not only to people in denial about their sexuality but to their opposite sex partners, who feel betrayed.


I think that the late Anthony Perkins is a great example of how damaging the anti-homosexual propaganda is. Tony tried to be in a straight marriage. He was by all accounts a loving father and his wife described him as her best friend. But he ended up having numerous shame-filled one night stands with other men and contracted HIV. At the end of his life when his wife was asked why she didn't leave him, she said that he had always treated her kindly and respectfully and she would not leave him in his time of need. She understood what many people fail to understand. If he had been able to be true to himself, to find a same-sex partner that he resonated with, his shame wouldn't have led him to these promiscuous affairs.
You can't "pray away the gay" any more than a straight person can "turn gay overnight." Marcus Bachmann and his ilk are doing terrible harm to people who are already conflicted.

Monday, July 11, 2011

Signs You're Getting Old: No more spicy food for your weak guts

I made a dismal discovery today. Son was kind enough to spring for dinner at our favorite diner. I had the egg and potato skillet with chorizo and half and half green chili (half mild, half spicy.)
Later on, the "spicy" worked its magic and I found myself glad that I'm somewhat incontinent of urine, because if I hadn't been wearing a Poise pad, I would have been changing my underwear and pants. Like Fry in the above photo, I was hoping it was a fart and not a shart. Alas, it was not meant to be.
So in order to avoid potential future embarrassment, I will henceforth be avoiding the spicy green chili. 
Getting old means: Glad you're incontinent of urine because it will protect your pants from sharts when you eat spicy food.
Wow. That's fucking dismal.
Have fun, Kiddies!

Social Networking


Nick of Guy Speak writes about Google Plus and social networking.


Facebook can be awfully clique-ish. I suppose any of these groups can. I know people who get some sort of sick thrill "culling" their Facebook list. I have felt sick in the pit of my stomach the few times I've felt the need to unfriend someone. I have a love-hate relationship with social networking. I enjoy the interaction and the potential to make friends, but it's almost always shallow. I'm no less lonely than I ever was.
Before anyone sees the need to lecture me about "getting out there and making friends," I have always been a very shy person and living with mental illness makes it even more difficult. Plus I don't have time for going out much. I work the night shift four days a week and am helping my son commute to classes at the community college and get his life in order many other times. I'm not even looking for any sort of romantic connection--I literally never want another one. I just like reading the things the guys write here at Guy Speak. They are wonderful people.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Too Late


Mystery Man talks of feeling regret while watching the shuttle liftoff that he will never be able to become an astronaut because he is too old.
Because of undiagnosed mental illness I missed a lot of opportunities to start things when I was younger. I'm trying to start some of them now but others I'll never be able to do because I'm simply too damn old. It's a lot harder when you're older. I feel sorrow for this every day and try not to hate my younger self too much because it wasn't entirely her fault. Still, I can't help but think that she could have been a little more sensible anyway.